By Sammi Bray
I first began seeing a therapist in my sophomore year of high school. Quickly, I learned that the feelings and thoughts I had been experiencing for the past several years, a majority of my life, was in fact, anxiety. At first, I was surprised. I have anxiety? I guess I feel worried sometimes, but anxiety sounded so much bigger than that, so serious. Through therapy and the support of my family and friends, I’ve realized it isn’t so scary. I’ve also learned that I’m certainly not alone, as nearly 40 million Americans in the United States have anxiety, according to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America. Among college students, anxiety is the highest mental challenge. To learn more about anxiety, specifically in teens and during the current pandemic, I interviewed two local therapists. First, Southington based Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Marie E. Bray has been helping clients with a variety of struggles, including anxiety, for over a decade. She also happens to be my mom! I also interviewed Julie Cipes, a Licensed Professional Counselor and Certified School Counselor. Cipes specializes in working with children and adolescents around issues related to anxiety, depression and emotional dysregulation. 1. How would you describe anxiety?: MB: Anxiety is thoughts and feelings of worry and fear. It creates physiological responses, an adrenaline rush, such as a racing heart, sweating, or rapid breathing. JC: Anxiety is a biological response to a perceived threat, with or without the threat being present. 2. During your time as a therapist, what have you found to be the most useful technique for helping clients cope with anxiety?: MB: The techniques that seem most helpful in managing anxiety are cognitive behavioral therapy and breathing techniques. CBT is about being aware of and changing our thinking. How we think about something controls how we feel and how we behave. Breathing techniques are also helpful because they shift our focus and slow down those physiological responses. Anxiety is energy. Anything that shifts our focus and helps us to use our energy in a productive way is helpful. Exercise, dancing, going for a walk, watching a funny video, talking to a friend. JC: The most useful techniques I have found involve psychoeducation. For many people, anxiety is a mystery. It consumes us, can be overwhelming and feels uncontrollable. As a species, we are biologically hardwired to experience anxiety. The goal of therapy is not to eradicate it, but rather to learn how to deal with it when it arises. Without understanding the biological basis for anxiety, one’s innate response is to avoid it, and this can create a very maladaptive pattern of responding. 3. Is there anything people/teens can do to eliminate anxiety?: MB: No, and you don’t want to eliminate anxiety. It serves a purpose. It tells us to be aware of something and that we need to react. For example, driving a car and another car pulls out in front of you. You need to react and step on the brake. You get an adrenaline rush, react, and then calm down. Sometimes anxiety tells us that we need to leave a situation that is dangerous. Anxiety becomes a problem When it continues to exist and interferes with how we participate in and enjoy life. JC: There is nothing we can do to eliminate anxiety. There are things we can do, however, to abate the symptoms. These interventions include diaphragmatic breathing, lessening exposure to stressors and building a healthy support network. 4. How has anxiety changed during COVID?: MB: With COVID, there is a universal and pervasive feeling of anxiety. Everyone’s stress level is high. Because it has continued for so long, tolerance and patience levels are overwhelmed. JC: The biggest change during COVID has been the lack of outlets to which people have access. Prior to COVID, common coping mechanisms included spending time with friends, connecting with others and involvement in extracurricular activities. COVID has limited our options and most of us have had to learn how to cope with palpable anxiety while remaining in one place: home. 5. How have youth/teens who previously lived with anxiety adapted to COVID?: MB: For some teens with anxiety, they may adapt more easily. Anxious people tend to be sensitive and take in a lot of their environment. Working remotely might suit them better. There is less stimuli for them to react to. If they have been in therapy, they may have already learned coping mechanisms that they can rely on. For others that may be struggling with how to cope, I encourage them to find ways to interact with others, be active and be with nature. They may need to seek outside help and support if they’re unable to do this on their own. Encouragement and support from others can have a big impact. Particularly, when one is feeling isolated, alone and afraid. JC: Teens and youth have had to become creative in the ways in which they cope with strong emotions. Many children and adolescents have reconnected with past interests, such as reading, crocheting, drawing or hiking. Needing to “think out of the box” has fostered a sense of creativity and a new appreciation for things most people took for granted in the past, such as family, nature and solitude. 6. For clients who never had anxiety before COVID, how is it different from those who have been living with anxiety before?: MB: Everyone has some level of anxiety. Which again, is normal and not necessarily a pathology. During covid, this anxiety is a response to real circumstances. Validating the reality that this is scary is important. Then focusing on facts and on what one can do will give a better sense of control. For example, wear a mask, wash your hands and social distance. Recognizing that the majority of people will recover is also a good reminder. JC: To me, there really is no real difference between children and teenagers who have dealt with anxiety in the past and those who are dealing with anxiety now. In the age of COVID, everyone has access to the same outlets and has to adhere to the same practices: wearing a mask in public, socially distancing from peers and family and staying away from large gatherings. Because everyone is now dealing with the same deck of cards, it matters very little if you’re a seasoned veteran when it comes to anxiety, or the new kid on the block (so to speak). Emotions are emotions, just the same. 7. Additional comments: MB: Everyone reacts to anxiety differently. Anxiety creates uncomfortable feelings and thoughts. If anyone is struggling with how to manage those thoughts and feelings, they should reach out for help. There are many resources available. With help and practice, people can learn to manage their anxiety. I want to thank both Ms. Bray and Ms. Cipes for not only allowing me to interview them and sharing this incredibly helpful information, but for their dedication to helping our community. Mental health advocates like them are essential to the success of youth! |
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